The mentally handicapped in action.

I've learned to keep MTV turned off for pretty much the whole of the last decade. Not that it was good before that, but I really didn't know any better. The second I did, out it went. Yet, I couldn't help but notice that Kanye West was making an ass out of himself again, so I figured that I would hotlink a wonderful Cracked post entitled "What if Kanye West Is Retarded?"

So, on the gaming side of things, more of the same behavior took place.

As you may well be aware, Sega announced their new 2-D, HD, revitalized Sonic game due out in the near future. Without anything to go on, we can only presume that this will be the massive success that Sega has wholly ignored over the past decade and beyond, or the utter failure that they have come to personify when it comes to ruining prized IPs.

This interview lets me believe that the latter is more likely. In essence, the guy's job is PR, and I say "the guy" because he's a no-name that will remain so if he continues to spout off this nonsense during interviews. Read it. It honestly sounds as if he finds nothing glaringly wrong with any of the recent Sonic games. Gamespot, not known for gripping journalism, was basically bashing the guy and letting him wade through his own shit. Look, it's one thing to come out and say that you really screwed up the last decade of Sonic games. That, we could understand, provided there was a good game following that statement up.

What we, the community, are getting instead is a colorful explanation about why we should love the culture of Sonic and his fifty useless, not nearly as cute as Sega would imagine, sidekicks. No employee seems to want to admit their screw ups, and that's bad news. The closest admittion of guilt was when one of their designers said that in order to make the 3-D Sonic title that everybody wants, they would have to code excessive miles of real estate into the game. It was at that point I realized that Sega should have the Sonic IP taken away from them like a child would be taken from a terrible parent, and instead given to Criterion games.

It only makes sense. They code miles of detailed tracks into their games. They built freakin' Paradise City. All the Sonic franchise has ever needed was colorful blocks to run on, so I'm calling bullshit on that "designer" for his inability to do, well, work.

We'll see how this turns out. Personally, I'm hoping for more real estate on the screen with the upgrade to HD, but somehow I'm guessing that the common sense gene isn't so common in Sega. I just don't have faith anymore.

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